The Divine Crash

Recently I went to a conference to learn about church leadership. It was wonderful and amazing and I learned so much. While at this conference there was a bookstore set up.  I was in heaven! I don’t know about you but I love books. Real books. Not those electronic books. I need a real book that I can write in and highlight and carry with me all the time. So between workshops at the conference I was poking around the bookstore.  I found a new Bible at 65% off. It was one with notes that I didn’t already have and it was a nice leather cover, full color maps, and a concordance. It was perfect. The price was right, the tools were right, the texture was right, everything about it was perfect.  Almost…I didn’t like the color. So I looked for the same Bible but with different colors and I couldn’t find any. So I asked, but it was on clearance and that was all they had.

So I was left with the perfect Bible to add to my collection but in a color that I didn’t like. I was dejected and I complained to the manager. They apologized and explained that because it was only a three-day conference they did not have a large selection of books.

I ended up buying the Bible and then thinking how silly it was to complain about the color of a Bible. The inside is what matters most.

I wonder how often we end up doing the same thing in other aspects of life? How often is everything perfect and so we find one small part that we almost don’t like and turn it into something huge and throw a fit because we don’t like it?

I think there are times to complain and make a fuss but I think there are other times where we pick our battles and decide which ones just aren’t worth dealing with? Sometimes things aren’t worth worrying about, just take a deep breath and move on.

As I read my Bible, with colors I don’t like on the cover, I see in Matthew 26 and 27 that Jesus knew when to open his mouth and when to keep it shut. He was about to die and still knew enough not to speak up about the little things.  Maybe that is an art we need to I must practice more?

Recently, I have been thinking about calling.  What makes a calling? Where does calling come from? How do I know it is valid? Can it change? What happens when I reach my calling?

And here is what I found, callings come from God and come from somewhere deep inside. Maybe that inside is God or maybe God is creating that feeling but either way there are two parts. One from outside and one from inside.

However, I have also found callings are fickle beings. They are not determined by a status or by other people. They are not a goal or an end point but more of a journey after the elusive end.  We can chase them but too often they move just out of our reach and we keep going after it and then when/if we finally get it we realize it wasn’t the end we were called to but the journey.

So then, what kind of journey do we follow? Do we follow on a path of our own creation? Which I think if we are doing that will take us down all sorts of paths and at worst will bring us to our own destruction or at best will lead us to mediocrity and boredom.

Or do we follow a different path? The kind of path that is narrow and difficult but was laid out for us before the creation of time? That kind of path is the one Jesus is calling us to and may not lead to riches and glory in this life but it sure isn’t boring and it definitely isn’t mediocre.

Wow. I turn my head from the blog for a few minutes and a month goes by. I can’t believe it has been a month since I updated. I really need to get better at all of this. I have lots of ideas of things to post and I just don’t get around to posting them. So we will see what happens now. Hopefully I can do a little better now.

Recently I have been confronted with this notion of the voice of the Gospel. When I read the gospel I hear the voice of a God who screams to us. A God who is sick of whispering, and tired of the still small voice, and begins screaming into the world.

I read this ancient document and I find a God who is hanging on the cross screaming for the whole world to pay attention. To turn from this madness of the rat race and hypocrisy of the American Dream.  To turn from all that and live for a better day, a paradise that is coming soon.

Our Gospel is standing in the gap between life and death and screaming out that we are free!

The question becomes if the Gospel is screaming so loud, why are those who believe in the gospel so quiet?

Why have so many of us kept quiet about the injustices around us, the poverty that surrounds, and the hate that prevails? Shouldn’t we be standing in the gap of joy and pain and screaming that the Jesus has set this whole world free to experience true joy?

So then, may you go out into the world and not just be a city on a hill, be a flame-thrower to a dark world that is crying out for someone to light the way.

If you have been watching the news the last few days you have seen that Hurricane Sandy has been a big deal here in the northeast part of the country. NYC subways have flooded and people are with power and even reports of some people dead. This storm is a huge tragedy.

What I have noticed though is that 1 rain drop doesn’t really bother anyone.  Even 100 raindrops isn’t that big of a deal. It is when Billions of raindrops all drop at the same time that destruction, damage, and death start to happen. It is when all those rain drops happen that things are never the same again.

I think it is that way in life.  One bad thing, one Monday, one thing happens and it hurts and we notice it but it doesn’t really disrupt us.  But then sometimes it feels like a billion bad things happen all that same time and then it really hurts. It really costs us something and we are never the same again.

So what do we do? How do we deal? I think that when all those bad things happen we take our plan from those who have lived through the real hurricanes. We rebuild, put our lives back together again as best as possible and we try to move on. We carry the memories, the scars, and the limp that came from it but we still carry on. We plug-in to a strength that comes from God and is bigger than ourselves and we start moving forward. Yes, still with the grief and pain but we use that to strengthen our resolve and carry ourselves closer to a time when there will be no more raindrops, hurricanes, cancer, death, poverty, and injustice.

So then, when you find yourself in the hurricanes of life may you find that your strength comes from above and may you find that strength to hang on for just a little bit longer because a new day is coming where rain does not win.

Recently I was diagnosed with Arthritis in my ankle. It turns out that years of martial arts and a few extra pounds isn’t good for my joints and so at 29 I have constant pain in my ankle.  While my doctor figures out what she is going to do I am stuck trying to live with this achy joint that reminds me of how weak I am every time I move. I wonder if this is the Thorn in the flesh that Paul talks about, in 2 Corinthians?

I wonder if I pray enough if God will take it away?

Which brings questions about why God answers some prayers and not others? Why does God heal the convicted killer of cancer but ignore the child with leukemia?

Why does God do the things that God does?

Some see these issues as reasons to not believe in God. Still others see this has the mystery of God.

Me, I just look at it and say “that miracle must have been from God.” and I really don’t have an answer as to why God does what God does. All I really know is that my ankle hurts and I want a miracle.

What miracle do you need? The Bible says that God is close to the broken-hearted, so how are you broken-hearted? How do you need God to move in your life?

I don’t know if God will, but I know that God can and often does. I also think that, too often we don’t see God moving because we aren’t looking.  That sometimes God uses the doctors to do the impossible but because we aren’t paying attention we think that the Doctor just did it instead of God doing it.

Maybe I’m wrong. People far smarter than me have written thousands of pages about God and still don’t have all the answers so a simple blog post will never capture all there is to capture about God.

I have a four-year old and for the last 18 months we have been working on potty training. It is the hardest issue I have had to deal with. And I think part of the problem is I have been potty trained for so long I don’t know what it is to not be potty trained. I mean I have been in “big boy pants” for so long how do I explain to someone what it feels like to need to use the bathroom.

And I wonder if that is the problem with mentoring new Christians? That sometimes we have been a Christian and follower of Jesus for so long that we forget what it means to wrestle with big questions of faith.  It is almost as if we have become numb to the fact that we are not always a Christian.  Maybe that is why it becomes so hard to talk to others about what is right and wrong about being a Christian.  Which makes me wonder if that isn’t why it is so easy for Christians to become judgmental of other Christians?  Maybe if we hadn’t forgotten what it was like to not have “it” all together we wouldn’t be so judgmental?

Myself included, my feet stink too. I know that I have been judgmental when I should not and I think it comes from the fact that I don’t remember what it was like to not know “everything” about faith.

but maybe it is when I know “everything” that I have actually forgotten the most important thing, grace and love for all people.

Recently I spent six months preaching through the book of Hebrews. I just finished and the sermon on Hebrews 12 about running the race got me thinking.  Then the Olympic runners got me thinking more.  Specifically I am thinking about how I finish this race of life.

Some want to finish in a comfy space, where they can rest and finally relax and be comfortable.

I don’t really want that. I want to run with so much veracity that there is nothing left.  I wanna finish like this guy (who isn’t me).

I want to fall down on the finish line exhausted, worn out, with nothing left to do but kick off my shoes, lay there, and guzzle the living water.

Life isn’t about coasting delicately across the finish line it is about crashing in on all cylinders, collapsing in the dirt and realizing that I left everything I had on that track with all those witnesses watching and letting out a deep sigh of relief.

What about you? How do you want to finish the race? Leave me a comment with your thoughts.